Sunday, June 05, 2005

some kosher and not so kosher news

For all those who might be wondering, and for those you just happened upon this site:

I think I ate pork last night.

And it was damn good.

=the pictures are from the ostrich farm in solvang. we went wine tasting a few months ago. they look like paintings, not photographs. A few minutes before we bought habanero olives. We each had one and instantly starting sweating, i mean dripping off our foreheads, eyes, eyeballs, pupils. It was getting hard to see and my hearing was starting to fade. something to do with the spicyness clogging up your ear drum. I don't know---apparently everything is connected somehow. anyways, the reason we stopped off at the ostrich farm was because they were selling strawberries. and they had free bathrooms. but the strawberries reeled us in. we bought an entire pack for 10 dollars. When your mouth is that much on fire, money means NOTHING.

Gotta study for finals. Anti-semitism is going to tear me up. You'd think I'd find it easy, right? A class on jew-hatred. not because because I hate Jews, but because I hate those who hate Jews. Make sense?

Off to the library. Oh, and god bless shiksas yet again. It's been a good weekend.


At 12:22 AM, Anonymous drew said...

You ate pork? And you call yourself a "super" jew...for shame.

At 8:45 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have some weird manias concerning Jews, probably stemming from anti-semitic thoughts. I have this compulsion to guess whether people are Jewish when watching TV or movies. Its a very disturbing preoccupation of mine. Something about jewish girls drives me wild, I'll occasionally cruise jewish dating sites to check out jewish chicks. I wish there were more jewish adult film actresses. Ive begun contemplating the merits of a full scale conversion to Judaism, but the feeling passes quickly. There would be no spiritual justification for such a move, strictly sexual. Moreover, it would require far too much commitment from my lazy ass.

A depraved individual. Quite possibly the Gentile Portnoy.

At 10:55 PM, Blogger Aaron said...

well, as long as you're doing it for the right reasons. (sexual ones) jewish porn stars? that's a great premise for a story, a short story. i wonder how the dialogue would work...probably something like::

dude in black hat: hey, im here to spread your bagel, baby.
the yente: Mazal Tov. Oy, oy...OY...

cue the nasty funk music.


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