The Dalai Lama is my Dog
Pleasure is temporary.
Displeasure is temporary.
Happiness is permanent.
Unhappiness can be remedied.
People tend to harbor emotions of pain, anguish, hate, jealousy. Why? Is it easy to retain dark feelings than happier ones? Why don't we laugh enough?
Why do I wake up congested in my apartment room every day?
Why didn't the landlord fuckers put in insulation?
Why do I hate shaving?
Why do I get headaches when I talk on my cell phone for more than 10 minutes?
Why do I fear I'm getting brain cancer from this fucking thing?
Why don't I have an endless supply of hummus in my refrigerator?
Why purpose do alligators serve? [in the grand scheme of things]
Why don't people have more casual sex?
Why don't the people who are having more casual sex give me a call, so I can properly say no?
Why did gigapets ever go out of style?
Why am I dead tired but still writing?
Why are you reading this?
Why did I write an entry that had the lyrics from you spin me right round baby right round?
Why am I so hairy?
Why am I so afraid to get anything waxed?
Why is my 22 year old friend a virgin?
Why doesn't he just admit he's gay?
Why doesn't he?
Why can't he just stop?
posted by _ @ 12:48 AM
3 comments
3 Comments:
Um, quite a random blog you have here.
So, aside from the fact that my professor just told us that she met the Dalai Lama before he became a celebrity, your blanket needs to be cleaned, your landlords are, as you said, f*ers, and that's why they didn't put in insulation, you hate shaving because facial hair is seriously hot, you get headaches when you talk more than ten minutes because your friends all have annoyingly-pitched voices, I don't know what you have a fear of getting brain cancer from, so I cannot tell you why you fear it (but you should refrain from using vague pronouns again--that I can tell you), you don't have an endless supply of chummus because you're not as smart as I am (I can say this with authority because I do have an endless supply in my fridge), alligators have gorgeous bag skin and look cool on Discovery Channel shows, people don't have more casual sex because they don't understand that it's just an aspect of a relationship same as having conversations and sharing food, and those who do don't call you because they know you'll say no, I don't know what gigapets are, you're still writing because you're dead tired and know that were you to do anything else with the last bits of energy you have, you will have to redo what ever it was in twice the amount of time in the morning, I am reading this because as someone with all the answers, I felt I owed you some of them, I cannot tell you why you wrote an entry with the lyrics from spin me right round baby right round because I know neither that song nor why you did, you are so hairy because you're Jewish, you are afraid to get anything waxed because it is the most painful thing you can possibly willingly subject yourself to (not me, I can subject myself to childbirth, but aside from that, this is definitely the worst), your friend is a virgin because all the girls he knows prefer it up the butt and he can't get them past that, he's not gay, obviously, or he would have given it to those girls up the butt, because he's not, okay, now you're just being repetitive.
Have a good day!
jewlicious
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